"I'm not the only one staring at the sun" U2

I have the best fiance ever. Seriously.

And NOT just because of the super sweet package I just opened from him, but because he is SO STINKIN' THOUGHTFUL!!

My step dad called me this afternoon to tell me a package had arrived for me...because he KNOWS how much I love mail {sidenote: our wedding response cards arriving by the multitude each day is like a dream come true for me. mail!every!single!day!} and he enjoyed taunting me with the fact that I had to wait 5 hours to open it since I was just heading to work.

So I rush home from a long night of work {"Hi! Welcome to Soma, sir! Are you shopping for someone special tonight? Oh, for yourself? Well...uh...let me know if I can help!"} to find a small white box from Point Loma Postal, which makes me even more happy because that means it's from Matt!

I rip open the box to find this:


Some of you may find it strange that he would send me tanning lotion, eye shields, and a Visa gift card for graduation, but it is the PERFECT gift for someone who is pasty, poor, and getting married in a month! He knew how badly I wanted to tan and how much little money I have.

For the record, I am SO not okay with tanning beds!! Especially with my fair skin. But I am even less okay with seeing veins through my translucent skin...

"Wait in the quiet, even in your fear. Your God is here to lean on" Shane and Shane

I spent the morning pouring over journal entries trying to wrap my mind around the journey of the past two years.

If I could take a minute and try to explain how difficult it was for me to move home...
I am very independent. When I left home at 18, I never intended to return--not even for the summer. Not because home was a bad place, but because I knew I could make it on my own. All three of my parents are entrepreneurs, self-starters, and successful at their own businesses, so that's partly where it comes from, I suppose.

I can't explain how I knew it was time for me to leave California. It wasn't something that I wanted to do. I loved it and there was nothing driving me to go. I didn't want to leave Matt, I didn't want to come home, and I CERTAINLY did not want to commit to living in one place for two years.

I felt Defeated. Fearful. Trapped. Hopeless. Confused. Angry. Depressed. Anxious.

The only comfort I had was knowing that the Lord led me here and that He had a plan. But that didn't mean I had to like it! Looking back, I sounded like a small child pleading with my parent not to leave the toy store. It's really quite embarrassing when I read through some of what I was thinking and writing. Never in my life have I felt more incapable of accomplishing a task before me...I was certain that something would change my course...in fact, I was praying for that!

But the two years have passed and I am still here. Two years and 17 days to be exact. And I know for sure that I would not be the same person were it not for this season of my life; exactly as it happened.

Now I am 39 days away from leaving again. I thought for sure I would be bursting at the seams ready to go. In some ways I am, but the thought of it is much more difficult than I anticipated. In the past two years, I have reconnected with my family in a deeper way, watched my brother graduate high school and start college, walked with my best friend through her pregnancy and a year of her precious little girl's life, completed my Master's degree, met people who will be lifelong mentors and friends, Matt and I are more connected than we would have ever been living in the same place for two years, and we're getting married!

But more important than all of this, I can confidently say I have learned to trust the Lord in a deeper way than I ever thought would be required of me. I have learned what a waste of energy it is to lean on my own understanding or to search for understanding in my circumstances.

I will leave here in 39 days Victorious. Fearless. Free. Hopeful. Peaceful. Joyful. Happy. Content.

"Trust in the Lord with all your heart. And do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make straight your paths." Proverbs 3:5-6

"It feels like home to me" Chantal Kreviazuk

Like most twentysomethings, things get a bit complicated when I try to explain what "home" is to me. So many places, so many memories and experiences; so many different seasons of life, but they all still feel like home.

Part of my heart still sits in Columbus, Georgia. The place I was born. The place where most of the people who made me who I am reside. The place that will always feel like home, even though I haven't had an address there in over 20 years. Magnolia trees...holidays...family. When nothing seems right, it's the place I go to drive around town, connecting with many pieces of my heritage all in one day. The home that is always waiting for me.

Part of my heart is in Peachtree City, Georgia. My giant playground throughout childhood. Bike rides to school...lemonade stands...block parties...best friends...family. The place that raised me. Kept me safe. Saw me through all the rites of passage as a child and teenager. The place where I will bring my children when it's time to go to their grandparent's house. The place of which I am so proud. I feel privileged to carry a pice of it with me. The home that shaped me.

Part of my heart is in Carrollton, Georgia. My first experience on my own. Dorm room...first apartment...independence...road trips...family. We weren't with our own families, so we became family for one another. The place in which I was dying to leave, but almost took my breath away when I left because I didn't realize how much it had become part of me. The home that challenged me.

Part of my heart is in Athens, Georgia. A dream I didn't realize was in me until it came to be. New friends...new experiences...new fears. The place that allowed me a piece of her heritage even though our time together was brief. A place no one can fully understand unless they have been part of it. The place where Matt and I will exchange our vows. The home that welcomed me.

Part of my heart is in Atlanta, Georgia. She is so alive to me. The place that has always allowed me to call her "home" when I didn't have the time or patience to explain that Peachtree City does not have peach trees all around and, yes, we have a golf cart. The place that has seen almost every part of my life as I passed through for dozens and dozens of concerts and shows and visits with friends. The place where I love to escape. The place that took me in right after college when I had no direction, and gave me some of my most treasured memories. The home that knows me.

Part of my heart is in Powder Springs, Georgia. Although it has never been my home and probably will never be, I feel at home there. It's the place the man I love called "home" for so many years. The place where he grew into the man he is today. The place where the people who helped shape him call home. The other place we will take our children when we're going to visit their grandparents. So it holds a piece of my heart. The home that accepted me.

Part of my heart is in San Diego, California. With all of her excitement and opportunity. The place where I can finally begin to grow new roots. The place that is so different from what I've always known, yet so comfortable and, somehow, familiar. The place where I know I will learn more about myself in just one short year than the previous 26 combined. The place I will learn to love deeper. The place I will learn to cook better. Most likely the place where Matt and I will expand our family. The place that condures up more anticipation and fear than I've ever experienced. The one place that will finally give me the chance to make it my own. The home that will be ours.

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Jamie and her friend, Elizabeth, had the idea to do a "blog carnival" and got a group of friends together to write about HOME today. Check out Elizabeth's blog here, where you will find other perspectives of "home".

"Oh Oh Oh..the sweetest thing" U2

Mandy and I got together last week to take some pictures of Olivia. I am beyond smitten with this child. I honestly don't know what I'm going to do when I move to California :(

Brian joined us for some family pictures, but the sun had almost set. Still a cute picture, though! Olivia was so happy to be with her parents.

"All I wanna do is have some fun" Sheryl Crow

I've hit my quarterly blog slump. It happens at least once every couple of months...words are hard to find, so pictures help!

These are from my recent trip to California...and my last visit before I'm Mrs. Hughes!! It was a very strange flight out of San Diego knowing the next flight I take from Atlanta will not return to Atlanta.

The pictures begin with my last day in town...enjoy!

We heard about a cool diner (Maryjane's) in the Gaslamp, so we recruited our favorite foodie couple to try it out. It's in the Hard Rock Hotel and we decided it's probably an awesome place to come at 1:00 in the morning when you're leaving the club and are sweating and starving from all the dancing...so I'm not sure if we'll be going back. But we are looking forward to "stay"cationing at the Hard Rock Hotel sometime! The best part is, we walked to dinner!

We (Matt) took my aunt's sailing! I was pretty helpful, though...I've gotta learn how to be my man's skipper? first mate?...what exactly is my title going to be, Matt?

Aunt Holly's 40th birthday dinner at the Ivy in Beverly Hills

Can't take these two anywhere...

As I mentioned, my aunts were coming out to run the Long Beach half. Here they are with their bibs. This was Aunt Holly's (on the right) birthday wish. Someone who asks to run 13 miles for their birthday isn't quite right to me...

And here we are with our bibs for the 5K. How was the run, you ask? Well, we missed it. The story is long and the details are unimportant. We still got the run in, it just wasn't tracked.


Our awesome friends threw us a super fun shower!!

These pictures are from my first night in town. Matt signed us up to host the monthly Finer Things Club with our fun friends. It was a little overwhelming having just landed and heading straight toward the kitchen, so I called on the help of my personal Julia Childs and she was able to fill in as sous-chef. I extended an invitation for her to spend the next 60 years with Matt and me as our wife, but she politely declined. I'll settle for frequent cooking endeavors with her as my guide.

Happy Fall Y'all!

"She's crafty..." Beastie Boys

I've had to explain the concept of "nesting" to Matt since we got engaged. I've been itching to "nest" since I was around 7 years old. I've always loved rearranging my room, organizing closets and cabinets, making lists, window shopping for kitchen gadgets and holiday decor, etc. My mother is constantly starting new projects around the house {the great thing is she actually finishes the projects...I'm a little worried about that for myself}. I am beyond excited to get my hands on our apartment in January and really set up shop.

Matt had the idea of me having a 'craft room' one day when we have a house. He understands my need for creative outlet and how limited I have been because of space. I've never had enough room in all of my living situations to work on projects that require more than just a couple of hours because I always have to work on my bed or at the kitchen table...meaning I have to get it all out and put it all away. No space for drying, waiting for inspiration, adding, subtracting...you get the idea.

I have no idea what I would do with so many colored pencils, but if I ever have a craft room...this is SO going to be my first purchase. Not only is it colorful, decorative, and functional--you can sign up to receive 25 pencils a month until you collect all 500 of them. If there's anything I love more than crafty goodness, it's getting mail!

"My hips don't lie..." Shakira

What have I been up to?

Zumba and belly dancing classes with mom.

"Whatcha gonna do with all that junk...?" Black Eyed Peas

I know I've been so absent lately...it isn't because I haven't had anything to say! It's just that life is FLYING by and I'm having a hard time keeping up. And when blogging becomes stressful {which it always does when I'm really busy}, I tend to shy away. It's supposed to be fun!

But I think you'll agree this video was worth the hiatus.

While at the beach about a month ago, the girls and I were leaving Baytowne Wharf {after our night of bachelorette fun}, and were stopped by a shady character making green screen music videos. Jamie, jaded by the empty promises of New York street vendors, tried to convince us that his claim of a 'free video' was a lie. I have to admit, I was skeptical as well, but he kept telling me he wanted to put us all in the video AND give us a free copy as a 'gift for the bride'. Now, I'm not the type to withhold from anyone the joy of giving, so I decided we should take him up on his offer.

All of us were draped in a green gown and what follows is something that will go down in history. If you know all of the girls in the video, you will have to watch it six times {one girl per viewing so as not to miss any sassy head nods or pursed lips}. I promise you won't be disappointed. Also, we had NO practice...that'll be obvious when you see our heads coming detached from our bodies.

I do feel the need to apologize for it being such poor quality. I had to stretch it for you to be able to see it at all. I tried uploading it to youtube, vimeo, hulu, etc...but it violated copyright laws.

"Just wasting time. Let the hours go by, doing nothing for the fun" Dave Matthews Band

I'm sure you're like me. When I have a lot on my plate, I look for little distractions to take my mind off of the mounting pressures. Last night, the distraction of choice was to beautify my tool set.

I "won" this in a gift swap last Christmas and have gotten great use out of all the tools the scissors.

Cute, right? I didn't have any ribbon on hand that would coordinate, but you'd better believe I looked for some! My step-dad said it looked ridiculous and the paint would come off whenever I use the tools.

Who said anything about using them?

"I be up in the gym just workin' on my fitness" Fergie

If you follow me on Twitter, you may have seen me occasionally mention CrossFit.

I just typed out a long post about what it is and why I started, but it was deleted. So, the short story is: It is hell, and Kristin made me do it.

Honestly though, it's been great to work out and actually see results. Though I haven't really lost any weight, I recently discovered a muscle in my arm I never knew existed! It's the hardest thing I've ever done, but also the most rewarding. I highly encourage all of you to look for one in your area, grab a friend and GO! My mom has been doing it with me (she's the almost-50 year old in the picture below who can wear bike shorts and still look awesome) and that has made it slightly less miserable!

Here's a typical sight right after a work out. Weights and kettlebells stewn about while mom and I beg for mercy and gasp for air.

With any good fitness regimen, nutrition is a huge component. The same is true for CrossFit who recommends the Zone. But I seem to have a difficult time merging the two...exercise and nutrition. I like to eat healthy and I enjoy working out, but I have yet to develop a lifestyle that incorporates both for more than a few days. Hopefully I'm on my way!

Starting in a couple of weeks, anyway...I'll be at the beach with most of my favorite people in just 9 sleeps!